About

Why is it easier to get an assault rifle and blackmarket bumpstock than find a nice thick veiny dick and a hairy-cherry-dumper that aren’t attached to someone with an egregious personality that validates my cynical and hostile world view, while levying such a tax on my patience they threaten to bankrupt my goodwill? Yet I remain hopeful that I’ll find myself balls deep in my true love whom I couldn’t bear to be apart from, even long after I’m bored with fucking him.

Surely there is that stud out there who can set my jaded loins ablaze with his kind eyes and freakishly large volume of ejaculate that isn’t a pathetic, clingy, histrionic drama queen, or a lovebombing, gaslighting, crazy making narcissistic bitchling that can’t and won’t shut his fucking mouth to save his life.

Is there a unicorn out there that doesn’t have the soul of a mean, cliquish, petulant highschool girl that inflames the worst aspects of my truculent character that I have spent decades diligently trying to refine? Instead I keep meeting fucking “Heathers” with dicks. FML!

Watching sports bores the shit out if me, but I immensely enjoy playing them. I ride my Cannondale hybrid all over hell & high-water and lift too. Practiced wushu kung fu for a few years but generally just go psycho and wing it, because it’s your cardiopulmonary stamina and sadistic antipathy towards an enemy that ultimately determines a fight. I always take the first punch so I have the legal impunity to “defend myself” until I run out of breath, or the cops show up. It shouldn’t have to come to that, but more often than not, some dipshit’s pride prevails over their common sense and human decency, and I reluctantly have to assert my boundaries and defend my human dignity. Pride is a “deadly sin” for a reason, but so is wrath. Nothing good will result from a proud bitch trying to best a shameless bastard who is indifferent to the opinion of others, and that is the nature of power struggle that inevitably emerges whenever I give my heart to someone who is only worth a fuck.

I’m not an ignorant hypochondriac who is afraid to let myself love a good man. Disparaging words in your profile like “clean” and “sane” are red flags you’re the type of bigoted ableist asshole who stigmatizes and ostracises entire classes of people. How about I kick your ass into a coma? Let’s see how well you still function in society and maintain gainful employment in the national economy, if you even wake up. Go suck the Devil’s big dick in hell because you won’t be throating mine. Fuck you & your mother who raised you wrong. You should have been stillborn.